"French Toast and Frank Talk"

Posted on 18 Jul 2020 @ 6:48pm by Lieutenant Avery Stuart Ph.D. & Commodore Harvey Geisler

3,236 words; about a 16 minute read

Mission: Ghosts
Location: Captain's Mess, USS Black Hawk
Timeline: MD 3 || 0800

Avery hadn't wanted to bother Harvey. Lord knew, he had enough to contend with as the Commanding Officer of the Black Hawk and now the father of twins. The last thing she had wanted to do was add to his plate, but she owed it to him to keep him informed and their semi-regular breakfasts had been a chance to do just that while checking in with him.

She wasn't sure what he'd be up for now that Tivan was technically his senior counselor, but that was partly why she'd requested to meet with him. Now that she was here again, the French toast was a nice bonus. "Thanks for taking the time, sir."

Harvey took a moment to sample his western omelet and poke around the accompanying fruit salad before replying. "Of course, Doctor." Tivan had made great effort, whether intentional or not, to wear out her welcome aboard the starship. While Harvey valued her work, he'd begun to disagree with many of her methods. This resulted in a lack of trust on his part. If that trust had any chance of being restored... Harvey didn't know what it would take. Keeping abreast with Doctor Stuart would certainly help him maintain a better temperature of the ship's morale, and not just the counseling sector.

"How are you? I was thinking about it, and I could see there being some similarities between parenthood and commanding an entire crew," She added, partly teasing and partly sincere.

He couldn't help himself but to laugh. "Parenthood and commanding an entire crew?" Harvey took a stab at the fruit bowl and selected a nice cantaloupe. "There are days when it is hard to separate the two."

Avery couldn't ever recall making the Captain laugh before. She enjoyed seeing him in a lighter moment. It was all the more reason she wasn't anxious to express her frustration and concerns. "I may not have given birth, but I understand that sentiment more than you would think," she replied with a chuckle of her own. "I feel quite maternal toward the crew. I've been with many of them for a long time."

"I haven't given birth to any of them either," Harvey joked between bites of omelet. "But I know what you mean. It's exciting to see crew members succeed, disappointing to see them fall. And, almost hurtful to see them move on."

Avery reached for her orange juice and took the time as she swallowed to consider what he had said. She could certainly relate to the sentiment. In particular, she had been sad to see Jayla go. She'd been happy for the friendly and loving that she gotten an opportunity to receive her dream job, of course, but selfishly, the therapist hated to see her leave. Jayla had been one of the few people Avery could consider a a true friend aboard the Black Hawk, someone who understood her passion for healing and could relate to the challenges of having to protect the crew, sometimes from themselves, and live amongst them all at the same time. "I see where you are coming from," she replied knowingly. "I was ecstatic for Jayla, for example, but more than a bit sad for myself. Lots of people are moving up and out. It does make me think," Avery answered.

Harvey paused at the table. He remained motionless, save for the blueberries he was chewing. In many ways, he understood what Doctor Stuart was sharing. Actually, he understood it in all ways. Like many in the crew, his relationship with Doctor Kij was special on many levels. Aside from their brief closeness, he had vast respect for the Trill woman. Harvey too was sad she. was gone, and all he could hope was that their paths would cross again one day. "Oh?" Harvey asked. "What would that be?"

Avery took a slow breath, considering what she might want to say next. She hadn't wanted her personal feelings to overshadow any of the professional concern she had. As a matter of fact, she had taken great pains to ensure it, and that was partly the reason she hadn't approached Harvey with any of this until now. She was torn between doing what was necessary to stand up for the crew and not adding to the stress of a man she deeply respected and acknowledged only had so much power. "I find myself in an uneasy position," she finally began. "On the one hand, I know my ultimate responsibility is to do what's best for the crew, whatever my rank and position personally, and to work within the realities we find ourselves, not to rail against the fact realities are not as I wish them to be. On the other hand, I question what good I can do and what my own sense of ethics and duty really mean if I have no choice but to be led, at least on paper, by someone I am truly troubled by."

"You mean Tivan, don't you?" Harvey asked. He cut off another piece of his omelet and prepared to consume it. The Vulcan Counselor's methods by now were known far and wide across the ship, so there was little point in dancing around vague statements. "And I know the feeling. I remember when I first received command of the Black Hawk, the Akira, of course. Starfleet makes it policy for new CO's to not be able to select a staff. Something to do with favoritism or something like. Since the Consortium, I've been lucky enough to handpick several. But Tivan... she's been forced on us by Admiral O'Connell to make sure we all are right in the head."

"Perhaps that's what Admiral O'Connell expects, but Tivan told me the first time we met she has no intention of seeing to the crew's mental health," Avery replied matter of factly. "She expressly told me she was leaving all of the counseling to myself and the other counselors so she could focus exclusively on her research. If she's calling people to her office, it isn't for treatment, Captain, it's for study. I expect sometimes it's explicit and sometimes it's study disguised as treatment, but I've seen and learned enough to know providing care is not her goal."

Avery took a forkful of her breakfast and used the time to consider her next words. "That in itself is cause for investigation, but on top of that, whatever her intentions, I can tell you the results have been disastrous. I've lost count of the number of people who've come to me with serious concerns about her fitness to serve and her unwillingness to act ethically. At first I thought the crew just needed to get used to a counselor of Vulcan heritage, but enough people have come forward by now that it's clear the behavior is detrimental and out of bounds for any counseling professional, regardless of heritage or personality quirk."

Harvey had stopped eating by this point. Avery's assessment had cut deeply. On another day, he might have shrugged it off, but once it had been coupled with Joey's personal assessment, along with Camila's actions from the other day, Harvey had a genuine cause for concern. "I don't take very kindly to my ship being hijacked." He could, however, appreciate that his senior staff were acting as antibodies fighting off an infection. "I'm being put in a difficult position, Doctor. We have endured more in a year than most crews do in ten. There's a reason why we were forced to the sidelines for so long. Starfleet wants its assurance, and my crew is rejecting their methods."

Harvey's response surprised Avery and she wasn't sure what to make of it. Was he confiding his frustration in her as his counselor or was he chastising her and the rest of the crew for raising concerns? "I can sympathize, Captain. Tivan's assignment here and her subsequent behavior has put me in an awkward position too. However, I wouldn't be much of a leader or a mental health professional if I stood by while a colleague refused to do the very job she was sent here to do and then behaved unethically. I know that's something you as medical professional can understand, and I'd like to think you know me and respect me well enough by now to know I wouldn't be expressing these sorts of grave professional concerns for something as petty as not liking Starfleet's methods or hiring practices."

He set his fork down and reached for his cup of coffee. Harvey didn't drink, instead he just swirled the drink around and stared down into the dark liquid. He'd never been one to sweeten or modify his drink, liking it just the way Wilkins had designed: a strong, bitter drink that was meant to give a tired body a firm shove back into an energetic state. That was how he liked his Starfleet. Orders were made, and you followed them. Orders were the only reason why he wound up in command red. A learned desire and skill set for command is what kept him there. "I do appreciate your concerns and opinions, Doctor. I always have, and that's not going to change. I just have no idea what to do in this situation."

Avery inwardly exhaled. It was a relief to know Harvey wasn't resisting or punishing the messenger given the circumstances. Instead, his struggle seemed to be a lack of clarity and sense of direction, which was understandable given the circumstances as well as all they had endured at the hands of others. This sense of lacking control was bound to carryover to more than just those individually impacted by specific parasites. It was larger than that. "I agree it is challenging, and I have found myself asking the same questions. Putting aside your current rank and position for now, what would you have done if you believed a colleague, a fellow healer, was not doing the job she was required to do and was behaving in a way that violated professional ethics?"

Harvey sipped from his cup of coffee. "Simple," he replied. "I'd gather evidence. I was a physician long enough to know that it didn't matter if your bedside manner was worth salt if you didn't know what you were doing. Tivan has a long, established history and record. If you're going to push back against her, then confrontation won't work. At least, not without evidence. You can't act on belief. You have to act on fact."

"I agree, Captain, which is why I've gathered information and I know others have made reports to Starfleet Command and Medical as well. In the meantime, however, as a member of the crew and a member of the senior staff, she is still subject to all of the rules and regulations that would be required of any member under your command, and that is why I am bringing this to your attention. I am concerned if you wait until a larger authority rules as to her fitness, the harm she could do to the crew and morale as a whole would be extremely detrimental."

"I'll need access to that information," Harvey pressed. "If I am to make accusations against an accredited professional, I'll need to have that."

Avery kept her face inscrutable but inside she was concerned. Surely, this wasn't the first time he was hearing concerns of this nature about the Vulcan counselor. Stuart had certainly been getting an earful from all over the ship, and she knew any other member of the crew from any of the other department would be approached for at least a discussion for doing far less. Avery couldn't fathom why he was so reluctant to address the issue.

In response, she offered, "I'll make sure you have my reports but it's hard for me to imagine my concerns are the first you're hearing of any of this. Am I mistaken in thinking she has been assigned to the ship under your command, subject to your authority as any other crew member would be?" Of course, if that were the case, Avery wasn't sure what to make of the situation. If Tivan wasn't supposed to be subject to his authority like any other crewmember in any other department, then why was she given the title of chief counselor? There seemed to be any number of mixed messages going on, and Avery didn't like it. "We are all accredited in our chosen fields, but unless I somehow misunderstood where she fits in the chain of command, I have never been given the impression you or any other commanding officer lacked the Authority to address professional and disciplinary concerns related to behavior exhibited aboard ship."

"She does exist inside our Chain of Command," Harvey explained, "And she also reports directly to Admiral O'Connell. That is why I cannot simply exercise my authority." The Captain rose from the table, picked up his mug of coffee and crossed the room. He stopped at the viewport and stared outside of it. "This crew has been through more in a year than ninety-nine percent of Starfleet has experienced in ten. Starfleet has hinted that we're a liability. It's been six months since we returned from the Convergence Zone, and we still don't have a mission assigned to us. if we don't play our hand correctly here, this crew... this family will be broken up and distributed throughout Starfleet. I could lose this ship, my home."

He turned to face Avery. "That is why, if we are to make a move, we must be sure of it. The risks are too great."

Avery exhaled her own feelings of frustration. That arrangement made absolutely no sense and anyone familiar with what it meant to be a healthcare provider would know that. A person could not be part of the crew in one sense but not in another. The conflict of interest seemed blatantly obvious to her. It was like they wanted the Vulcan to straddle a fence that was pointed in two opposite directions, the two roles in conflict with one another.

"If what you're saying is true, what move could we possibly make that wouldn't be considered suspect? If command is willing to put her in a position where she is both part of the crew and not at the same time, conveniently allowing her to pick and choose when your authority does and does not apply to her, I question whether our reports will do much good. That said, I choose not to give up before we've even started." Avery shook her head again in irritation. "I just can't imagine what senior leader within Starfleet Medical would think this is a good idea. Dual relationships and conflicts of interest are subjects that are discussed on the first day of classes for counselors and other healers. This doesn't even pass the smell test for anyone who isn't a healer."

Stuart exhaled slowly. It would do them no good to focus on the universe as it should be, so she chose to focus on the universe as it was. "Captain, I realize I am not officially part of the senior staff and that my request could be viewed by those who don't know me as naked ambition or sour grapes, but under the circumstances, I'd like to request that I be permitted to attend senior staff meetings with Tivan and to provide guidance to you on the bridge. Essentially, I'm asking to be given the opportunity to split the duties of a Chief Counselor. I ask this because my loyalties aren't divided, and if she has no interest in fulfilling the duties of her role as they relate to being part of this crew, then someone has to fill that gap. I'd like it to be me, sir, even if she wears the title. Perhaps you could explain it by saying you are interested in getting diverse perspectives, or you want to give me the opportunity for more experience. I don't care how you sell it, I just want to help."

Avery knew she was taking a risk. All this time she had been trying to be a dutiful officer, deferring to the chain of command and what was required of her, but now more than ever, it was clear to her it wasn't enough to wait out the storm. If she was going to essentially be doing much of the work anyway, why couldn't she ask to do more to protect her crew?

Again, Harvey did not immediately reply. For the last several weeks, he'd tried to be patient with his ship, and his crew, as they began to feel out this new normal that had been thrust upon them. Even now, as he heard Avery's words, Harvey began to rethink his stance on the situation as a whole. He was the one selected to lead this ship and its crew. He'd been allowed to keep as much of them together as he could, despite every reason Starfleet had. for breaking up his family.

He'd tolerated Tivan because he thought it was what was necessary, because that was what he thought he needed to do for his family. Maybe he was wrong. Tivan had been with them more than a month, and it made sense that she join them on their first voyage of the year, to observe the crew under regular duties, not sulking in drydock. There was no guarantee that her assignment was temporary, and so far she'd managed to alienate most of the crew. Time and time again, he'd been presented with a choice, and each time he'd found a compromise that favored Tivan more than others.

Perhaps it was time for that to stop, and time for life to return to normal aboard the Black Hawk at last. "Avery, you have been my confidant for more than a year, and I do appreciate that. Tivan hasn't come to the bridge often, so I don't see a reason why you can't be there. As for future staff briefings, I'll make those decisions case-by-case. But you'll most likely be at most of them."

As Harvey spoke, Avery felt tension leave her body she didn't quite realize she was carrying. When the conversation started, she wasn't convinced she was going to leave the conversation any less frustrated and concerned than she had been when she arrived. Now that they had reached an understanding, Avery felt a weight lift off her shoulders. "Thank you, sir, for your kind words and for the open mind. I will continue to document my concerns while also looking out for the crew. I know this won't solve all of our challenges, but I truly feel as if some weight has been lifted off my shoulders." Avery smiled. "I guess I'm not used to being on the receiving end of that feeling."

Harvey offered a weak, yet sincere, smile. "I don't think many of us are, but I do know one thing. I've lived through the Dominion War, the Romulan evacuation, the Mars attack, and more. The people I've met along the way are nowhere near as resilient than the crew of the Black Hawk. We'll make it through this latest test stronger than before."

Reaching for her coffee, Avery raised her mug and smiled. "I will drink to that."

The Captain raised his mug in unison. "To resiliency."

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