Life in Space
Posted on 15 Nov 2020 @ 8:00pm by Ensign Kelly Khan
511 words; about a 3 minute read
My life on the Black Hawk-A and her predecessor has been nothing short of one mission into madness after another. My name is Kelly Marie Khan, and I think I'm losing my mind and my ability to distinguish a friend from a foe. We're supposed to be here for exploration and discovering new civilizations and go where no one has gone before.
We've discovered those civilizations usually want to kill us, take advantage of us, are parallel's of us, or want our bodies. I was possessed, had to abandon a ship in a runabout full of personnel, have been on alien planets and seen amazing things. Mainly from the lower decks, but that's part of life as one of the lowest ranked officers.
My most recent sojourn into the unknown was trying to take a turbolift from Auxiliary Control up to Flight. I wanted a little music and a short ride. I got a lot of music and a long ride that ended with me talking to a albatross that decided I needed isolating because I wasn't like the rest of the crew and promptly isolated me in the corridor.
It took some time to get out of there and I don't trust the turbolift anymore and I think my hearing is finally coming back. Le sigh. Such is life in space, I guess, but it's taking a toll. As I said earlier, it's getting hard to tell the difference between friend and foe after all we've been through.
We've had crew that turned against us thanks to the Consortium and then the most recent chain of events in the Convergence Zone where the away team got possessed by alien parasites known as the Dolmoqour. I should have listened to that Orion that gave me the tattoo I got at the station before we crossed over. Something big and bad was coming and it came for us, overcame us, and then used us against ourselves, against our will.
We lost crew, friends, family and trust. Things will never be the same and I haven't told Tiger how I really feel, but it's getting harder and harder to talk to anyone about how I feel. I just can't trust anyone that might turn against me tomorrow, or tonight, or next week. Yet, I can't just alienate everyone on the ship. Maybe I'll find a way to restore my balance and peace of mind, but I doubt it. I don't even know if I trust myself.
Do we push too hard? Not hard enough? Should we go back to the Alpha and Beta Quadrant and become immersed there and live a life of mediocrity? Do we stay on the front lines of exploration and become battle hardened and suspicious against everything and every new species we meet? Will this change us? It already has. It's up to us to discover how to deal with these strange new worlds and try to find peace.
My name is Ensign Kelly M. Khan, and I'm going to come for you one day.